Days 28, 29, 30 and 31 – Sugar, sugar, sugar…..

I hope everyone had a lovely weekend and it is nearly the middle of the week!!!

I have done it – gone without power for a month. And it is something I will certainly not do again (unless some natural disaster caused a power outage). I’m sticking to no power till this Friday, then I will be turning that switch back to ON on the fuse board, wait 2 hours for the water to heat up in the hot water cylinder, then standing under that stream of hot water until the cylinder is empty.

It has been a huge learning curve for me, and I am pretty sure I will be able to survive a power outage that would go on for months. I sometimes wonder why I thought it would be a great idea to do it. The novelty factor of it wore off in about 2 weeks, when I realised what I had got myself into. It also highlighted just how reliant Western cultures are on electricity. I also missed having constant access to the internet, but it helped reverse my addiction to Facebook. I am going to try as hard as possible to only Facebook for a maximum of 2 hours a day, as it can be a bit of a time waster.

Food wise, probably haven’t made some very wise decisions over the past couple of days. I brought myself a bottle of fruit smoothie with spirulina, as my body wanted lots and lots of green stuff. Not a wise purchase due to the large amount of sugar in it (even though it is fruit sugar). I really should have made myself walk the extra 10 minutes to Harvest Wholefoods for some cavolo nero and made some salad from it. I also ate a large amount of gluten-free pasta with some vegan cheesey sauce on top. It would have been better if I added some veges to it. So I haven’t eaten a lot of raw, but getting back into it today.

Had a lovely organic avocado with chia seeds and himalayan salt for breakfast today, as my body was screaming for it. Then ate a couple of oranges. Lunch was my GF pancakes topped with organic tahini and raw agave nectar. Nom. Dinner tonight will be a GF pasta dish with grated veges, shredded cavolo nero, chickpeas and a sauce made from tahini, lemon juice, nutritional yeast, garlic powder, raw agave nectar and water *drools*

Looking forward to the food co-op this Saturday, as I am all out of almonds and other stuff. Plus I managed to get through about a litre of coconut oil in a month, and about 2 big jars of tahini. The savings are great, which is enabling me to eat more organic food. Plus food co-ops are a great way to interact with other people in the community and ensure that such services stay alive.

Now onto Louise Hay stuff, and a couple of past emotional issues have propped over the past couple of days. I posted on my personal Facebook page about it today, and I realised that I had PPD when I had L. Because of my extreme stubborness, I somehow managed to get through it. But I do distinctly remember sitting on the couch crying my eyes out when I breastfeeding Lucian feeling like a failure. I don’t know how I got past it, but it I do think the PPD contributed to the recurrent mastitis I had and feeling rundown all of the time. The cause of these feelings and memories to come back is due to some jealously I have over a cousin who had a baby about a week ago and all of the family around the country who have visited her and have been helping her with housework and allowing her to get some sleep. I had no help at all when I had Lucian, and because it was taking a long time to heal from my c-section, I would get so angry at my-then-husband over his lack of resolve to do housework. It is a good thing that this coming up and I am now doing affirmations to move past those thought patterns and to release all of that anger in a positive manner.

The one affirmation that has been helping me move past a lot of old emotional baggage is this one in You Can Heal Your Life is this: “I am willing to let go. I release. I let go. I release all tension. I release all fear. I release all anger. I release all guilt. I release all sadness. I let go of all old limitations. I let go, and I am at peace. I am at peace with myself. I am peace with the process of life. I am safe

I have to admit, I have some pretty awesome friends who are helping me (whether you realise it or not) rediscover my identity. So thank you friends, you know who are 🙂

Now, what my bodysculpting training? I am starting to incorporate some walking lunges. Up steep hills. A week of doing them is starting to produce some pretty good results already. This morning, I noticed in the mirror how much more toned my legs are. Still working on the abs, but that is definitely going to take time, clean eating and lots of cardio to shift that fat. I am starting to love my body now and not criticise it so much. I am starting to love the stretchmarks on my tummy, as it is sign that I nourished another life in me for 9 months. I am liking my breasts, as they nourished my son for 2 and a half years. Doing daily mirror work and saying “<em?I love and approve of myself” and “I love and accept myself exactly as I am” is finally starting to work and change my thought patterns.

I better end this now, as it starting to resemble the length of an essay. I may not blog tomorrow as I have a lot to do, so my next blog post will probably be about my love of hot showers 😛

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